How To Talk To Women (Without Being a ‘Creep’)

how to talk to women even if you are shy and afraid

Don’t know how to talk to women in the streets, cafes, malls, or any other public places? Then this post, titled “How to talk to women in the streets,” is for you.

These days, you do not have to go to a bar or a club to meet pickup women. You can find all sorts of women in all kinds of public places — at the cafes, malls, metro stations, bus stations, in the streets, library, museums, etc. The possibilities are endless.

But, here’s a catch: You need to learn how to talk to women during the daytime in public places, which is  slightly differently than how you’d talk to women during the night — at a bar or a club.

First of all, you need figure out whether…

She wants to be approached or not.

Before you even walk over to talk to women, you need to first look around to see if she’s approachable. For example, if you see a woman with another man or with her friends, that’s a huge sign she probably doesn’t want you to approach her.

If you see a woman with a pair of earphone plugged in her ears, then you need to understand that she doesn’t want to be approached. She is in her own little bubble and doesn’t want any stranger come up and intrude her world.

And, if she’s doing anything to look busy — reading a book or playing with her phone — she probably doesn’t want you to approach her.

But, if she seems bored and doing nothing much, then congratulations! She is most likely to be willing to talk to you… unless you do not ‘creep’ her out — especially in the first few minutes in the interaction.

How to approach a woman, properly

Now that you know she’s open to being approached to — she is not sending any obvious cues that she wants to be left alone — you need to make your move, properly, otherwise, you’ll set yourself up for a major rejection.

For example, if she is sitting down,you should walk over to her and sit down beside her, not stand up and look down on her, and talk to her. Do not sit too close or too far. Sitting close might freak her out while sitting too far might not seem like you two are having a conversation.

Or, if she’s standing, you need to walk straight up over to her, or from the side, and deliver a simple, “Hi”… with a smile to test if she is interested to talk to.

If she looks at you, and then, looks away immediately, then you need to understand that she probably doesn’t want you to keep talking to her. But, if she says “Hi” back to you, that a huge sign she’s interested.

After you’ve exchanged a simple “Hi,” it’s time to say something before the interaction gets awkward.

How to start to talk to women

You need to ALWAYS keep one important thing in mind when you’re trying to talk to a woman in the streets, cafes, malls, or any other public places: don’t be a creep.

What do I mean by ‘creep’?

Here’s what I mean: Just act normal. Talk to her as if you’re talking to one of your buddy. DO NOT pull out any fancy pick up lines and use on her.

Try to talk about her.

For example, if she’s wearing nice earrings, you can say, “I really like your earrings. Where did you get it from?”

Or, if she looks like a foreigner, ask her where she is from. And, then, share one of your travel stories with her, too.

Whatever she says back, try to pick out a word or two from that sentence and talk endlessly about it.

For example: If she says, “I’m from Italy, and I came here in Paris for a weeklong vacation.’

If you were paying attention to her, you’d realize that she just gave you 3 key conversation topics to talk about — Italy, Paris, and vacation. Now, you could talk about either one of those conversation topics untill your gum starts to hurt, or until she asks about YOU.

Or, if you’re still struggling what to say to her, then you could simply say, “Hey, you look interesting, what’s your name?”

Above all, DO NOT make it about her looks though – if you tell her she looks cute, she’ll immediately label you as a creep.

If the conversation stalls, it’s probably because she might not be interested. A few awkward pauses are fine, but if you have to carry the entire conversation with her, that means she’s only being polite talking with you.

How not to be ‘creepy’

If you’ve tried to strike up a conversation with a girl and she’s clearly not interested, do not keep trying. Let her go and do whatever she was doing, move on, and find another girl to talk to. If you keep on talking to her, it’ll only make her feel more uncomfortable, and, most importantly, it will lead either of you nowhere.

If you keep on trying, even after she said no, she won’t find you interesting. So stop it.

Just because a woman happens to be in the same public space you are in, it doesn’t mean that she owes it to you to have a conversation with you. If you manage to pick up a girl, congratulations … but do not get embarrassed — or act hurtful — when you find most women aren’t interested in you.

Thanks for reading,


P.S. BTW, here are more free tips on how to have conversation with a girl or a woman.

P.P. S. But if you truly want to overcome your shyness and crush your social/approach anxiety, once and for all… and learn how to talk to women anywhere — in the streets, cafes, malls, or any other public places –…

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Here are just a few of the cool things you’ll learn in this 136-page daytime pickup guide:

  1. 8 key daytime pickup components you must master to become really good at daytime pickup
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  3. Where to meet women
  4. How to be in tune with the energy level
  5. A crash course in striking up a conversation with women
  6. The most effective opener and HOW to deliver it to a woman
  7. What to do after initiating the conversation
  8. Why you must create a connection
  9. How to answer light rapport questions
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