You don’t have a clue as to how to start a conversation with a girl?
Starting a conversation with a girl is the BIGGEST hurdle a lot of guys have difficulty overcoming. Many guys are unable to think of “what to say” when approaching a girl all by herself in public places — streets, cafes, malls, metro stations, etc.
All of these questions might pop up in your head if you had to start a conversation with a girl:
- Do I use some cheesy sleazy pickup line?
- Should I ask for her opinion?
- Should I be indirect or direct?
You can use any of these three methods to start a conversation with a girl, but the harsh truth is that you still need to take action, first. A girl or a woman is not going to do that — approach and talk — for you. So if you want to talk to a girl, you’ll have to approach her.
So how to start a conversation with a girl?
There are several best way to start a conversation with a girl or a woman, but in this post, you’ll find 3 simple ways to start up a conversation with anyone. I have personally field-tested each one of these tactics when approaching a beautiful girl, and they works like CRAZY!
#1 Ways To Start A Conversation: ‘The Facial Expression Trick’
Let me be honest with you. When I was starting out in daytime pickup, my approaching skills sucked. Like most guys out there, I hated the idea of approaching a beautiful woman and striking a conversation. So one of the clever thing I have done for myself is to build an attractive lifestyle and get women to do all the legwork. Yeah, it’s kind of lazy, but it works almost all the time, you see. 🙂
But I know that the only way to meet a beautiful girl in the street is to be a MAN and approach her.
Now, I am not a big fan of using long and complicated conversation starters. There’s too much to memorize. Instead, I use stuffs that is direct and simple, which also get the ball rolling.
Who wants to waste 10 minutes telling awkward story, hoping the woman will find it interesting? If I’m going to fail, why not fail fast, right?
So whenever I see an attractive woman, I use my facial ‘trick’ conversation starter, which works almost all the time. With this simple trick, you can approach a girl without even uttering a word from your mouth.
When you’re in public spaces — streets, malls, cafes, or anywhere else — the natural thing to do is to observe who is around you. Your goal is to use your surroundings to your advantage.
And, once you see a girl…
You approach her and say whatever comes to your mind.
While doing so, hold eye contact with her, and smile. 🙂
And, whatever she’s saying/doing at that moment, flash an over-exaggerated look at her, which will make her giggle. I like to flash a funny and playful face.
Now, you might be wondering, Why this conversation starter works?
Here’s why: Most guys act too serious when they’re in a social settings like a club, bar, or a cafe. They’re self-conscious to be themselves, and they act they’re busy to give off that ‘tough guy’ vibe. I was that guy, too. 🙂
To set yourself from these pack of guys, what you should do, from now on, is show her that you don’t really give a damn about the OUTCOME. That you don’t take life too seriously. By showing a girl or a woman that you’re playful and demonstrating that through expression, you show to her that you are ‘a FUN guy.’
Without even saying a word, she’ll immediatly know that you’re the type of guy she’ll be interested to meet.
For me, I say something like, ‘Hey, did you get my text message?’ (if she was reading something on her mobile). This only gets her to laugh even more.
So what type of faces you should make to start a conversation with a girl… without speaking?
Remember, there’s no hard and fast rule. But at least try to get her laugh.
Here are a few examples:
- Give her a ‘pouty’ look
- Stick your tongue out
- Give her a mock-embarrassed look.
- Show the exaggerated ‘pick up artist wink.’ 😉
- Show a fake a suspicious look — like you’re not sure why she’s looking at you.
- Do a mock ‘in love’ expression — grab your chest and flutter your eyes
- Send a quick wave
- Give a quick head tilt (like the “what’s up” expression)
- Pretend to be really angry and then crack up into a smile.
- Display big ‘shit-eating-grin’ smile. 😀
At this point in time, you must be thinking, How will it help me start a conversation with a girl?
Let me give you an example. I learned this trick from one of my close friends who was really good with women. He isn’t the most handsome guy in the room, but he’s pretty successful with women.
A few years back in time, he met his recent girlfriend at a nightclub. After talking with her and making an eye contact, he went to great lengths to make her laugh (at my expense, I might say.)
Being such a great friend that he is, Aaron ‘threw me under the bus’ just to get a laugh.
As I was busy talking with other people, he just looked over to this girl as she was talking with her friends, and all of a sudden, he started to do ‘fake-choking’ himself pointing at me with a smug look on his face. And before I could ask Aaron what the hell he was doing, he was across the room busy talking with his future girlfriend.
This brief story brings up a few KEY points:
- You do not have to rely on pick up lines or gimmicks to start a conversation with a girl
- Just a warm smile and a friendly attitude can be your ‘secret’ weapon of getting girls.
A few pointers: When using facial expression, she might look away from you, initially. And making an eye contact with a complete stranger could be uncomfortable for a lot of guys. But if you keep on practicing with more women, it will become easy and natural part of your life.
Oftentimes, a girl will look away for a while and then wait for a few seconds before looking back again. And when she is doing this, MAKE SURE you do not turn away. Instead, keep smiling at her or nodding your head at her or use any of the ‘funny expressions‘ I just mentioned above to you.
Remember THIS: Just by being ‘playful,’ you can make any girl talk with you. And when you get a positive response — an enticing smile — from her, the only thing you’ll have to do is… learn how to approach a girl at first sight.
#2 Ways To Start A Conversation: ‘Ask For Her Opinion‘
The ‘opinion’ opener is also a great way to start a conversation with a girl. And applying this simple technique is surprisingly easy. You’ll have to approach a girl and ask for her opinion on things.
The ‘opinion opener’ does three things for you:
First of all, it allows you to start a conversation with a girl.
Secondly, it helps you get her attention — she has million other things to get distracted about.
And thirdly, it allows you to transition into getting to know her better mode.
That’s why this conversation starter is very different from other method because it sounds very natural, which is unlike any corny pickup lines that most guys use without any success.
Here’s WHY asking for a woman’s opinion WORKS:
- Women LOVE to offer their opinions.
- You can use the response you get from her and use it as a follow-up conversation.
- You’re not outrightly displaying your intentions.
- You become more interesting than other guys who don’t approach her.
- Here are other few critical elements about ‘opinion opener’:
Insider tips: Try to make your opinion an open-ended question so that her response will be more than just a simple ‘Yes’ or ‘No.’
Secondly, if there other people in the group, involve everyone, and not just the girl you’re interested in. Do this to every group you approach so that they’ll get an impression you’re a FUN, outgoing guy.
Thirdly, to make the ‘opinion opener’ even more effective, give yourself a time constraint. If the group knows that you’re only going to stay there for a few minutes, then they’ll be more likely to open up with you and be friendly. You can easily accomplish this by starting the conversation like this: “Hey guys. A quick question…”
So you see constructing an opinion opener isn’t that difficult. You just have to sit down and think about 3 to 4 engaging questions you can ask any women.
Here are few opinion openers that I have used in the past, which worked really well with the ladies:
“Hey guys, just a quick question… My buddy and I was were having an argument yesterday that I hope you guys can settle…”
“We were having a discussion about our other close friend who cheated on her girlfriend and was caught red-handed…”
“Unfortunately, his girlfriend found this other girl’s g-string underneath his bed. To cover for himself, my friend told his girlfriend that he has a fetish for wearing women’s underwear. What’s really interesting is his girlfriend totally loves his new idea and makes him wear this G-string…”
“So can you guys help me solve this argument once and for all? What do you think: should he continue to cover himself or should he be honest with his girlfriend?”
Well, these opinion opener has been used by many guys in the past. So you’ll have to come up with something that’s a little bit different.
The main element I want you to pay attention is to the elements of humor, drama, and interest that’s been used in this opener. Remember to use all of these elements to create your own opener.
#3 Ways To Start A Conversation: ‘Go Direct‘
This conversation starter doesn’t require you to play any ‘mind games’ with the ladies. Many guys think they need a ‘magical line’ to talk to women. But that’s really not true.
Sometimes, being direct generates the best result.
Here’s what I mean: You approach a girl you’re interested and immediately let her know you want to get to know her better. To do this, you don’t use any pickup lines, gimmicks, and opinions. You simply let her know that you saw something interesting about her — the way she’s walking, her hairstyle, the earrings, or her long black coat — and you want to know more.
And, make sure to mention to her that you liked something about her that doesn’t have anything to do with her looks. So it should be an opener that relates to her action, behavior, or her style, rather than her attractiveness. That way you won’t seem to her as another corny pickup artist. Instead you’ll come across as ‘a confident guy’ who knows what he wants and isn’t afraid/shy to go for it.
In my case, I use different versions of this conversation starter when I do daytime pickup. I walk up to a woman and tell her how busy I am, but then there was something intriguing about her that really made me want to go and talk to her.
For example, I often say something like to start a conversation with a girl:
“Hey, I am on my way to (insert whatever you’re doing), but you seem like a friendly person (or, I like your long green coat that make your look classy and stylish) and I could not help but come up to you and say ‘Hi.’ My name is…”
Of course, this is a direct way of starting a conversation with women. She can either choose to get to know you better or she might say no. It’s like high risk/high reward thing.
Remember: With this conversation starter, you’ll often get rejected because the woman often has your looks and body language to judge you by. So if you’re not displaying a confident attitude, then she might blow you off.
But trust me when I say this: When the direct opener works, it really WORKS. If she’s interested in you, you can say goodbye to a lot of game playing that you often have to deal with indirect openers.
Rather, you’ll head to the point where you both know you like each other. It’s also a great way to escalate things physically with the girl.
Depending on the situation (and what you want), you may want to use variety of adjectives other than ‘nice’ or ‘cool.’
Here are few powerful adjectives you can use to make your direct opener even more effective:
With this conversation starter, your action becomes random. If you do your approach right, you’ll come across as a confident guy who she has been fated to meet.
A great advice: The direct opener works really well during daytime pickup when you don’t have a lot of time to talk with people. Because of this, you’ll get right to the point, talk to her only for few minutes, and if you’re interested in her, ask for her number.
I highly recommend that you approach at least 5 to 10 women a day using this technique.
Thanks for reading.
P.S. BTW, here are more free articles on how to start a conversation with women:
- 6 Powerful Ways To Improve Your Communication Skills, Instantly!
- THESE 6 “Good Conversation Starters” Spikes Attraction, Almost Instantly!
- How To Make Conversation With A Girl (And Immediately Build Solid Connection)
- How To Talk To Women (Without Being a ‘Creep’)
- How to Avoid Awkward Silences with Women (2 Simple Tricks Unleashed)
P.P.S. But if you truly want to learn the art of conversation, anytime — day or night –, anywhere — on the streets, cafes, malls, bars, or any other public settings — , and with anyone — men or women — then…
… check out this kick-ass resource.