Hey there! How is it going?
So you want to learn ways to “approach strangers” on the street, cafes, malls, or anywhere else and effortlessly strike up an interesting conversation with them?
As a self-improvement coach, I’ve personally noticed A LOT of guys not meeting and connecting with strangers — particularly beautiful girls they’d like to know better — on social environments (streets, cafes, malls, etc.) simply because they’re afraid of making mistakes or making a BIG MESS out of it.
But these situations also provides you with an excellent opportunity to develop your social skills and improving your “social vibe.”
So, today, you’ll learn how to APPROACH and TALK a stranger in social environments like cafes, malls, streets, subways, etc. during the day.
But before that, I want you to burn this new mindset in the back of your mind: always expect to receive a POSITIVE RESPONSE from your interactions.
When you cultivate this “positive mindset”, you become a POSITIVE guy, and as a result, not only you’ll have more meaningful interaction with others, but you’ll also be able to CONNECT with them, emotionally.
Remember: to make other people feel POSITIVE feelings, you must feel it FIRST.
As you start to build this ‘mindset’ of always expecting a POSITIVE OUTCOME from all of your interactions with random strangers, then naturally YOU’LL BECOME MORE POSITIVE, and as a result, the other person you’re talking to (the cute girl you want to know better) will FEEL that POSITIVE VIBE from you too.
Here are 6 simple things you need to do to become excellent at approaching random strangers in social places and strike up a conversation with them:
1. Always have a smile on your face.
When you approach a girl walking on the streets, she doesn’t have any clue who you are. So in order to make her feel comfortable and trust you, approach her with a BIG SMILE so that she does not find you a threat to her.
Remember: make sure to smile throughout your interaction with her. Do not worry if it feels first. Over time, as you practice doing it every time you approach a stranger, it’ll become your new habit, and soon, you’ll be smiling when approaching a girl and interacting with her… without even realizing about it.
2. Always talk sloooooooowly
Most guys become tense and nervous when talking to a stranger because they fear running out of things to say or facing awkward silences.
But here’s good news: silences (non-verbal language) is also a key communication tool that helps build tension between the two of you, which sparks ATTRACTION.
Waiting for at least a couple more seconds before responding can instantly build more tension (attraction) than uttering words out of your mouth.
And make sure to talk slooooowly when you TALK as it will give you plenty of time to think WHAT TO SAY next to her, and as a result, she’ll feel relaxed and calm talking with you.
3. Always think “win-win”
When it comes to approaching and talking with a random stranger, most guys do it WRONG! If they make a mess of their approach/interaction with a girl, they often beat themselves up saying, “Oh, that plain sucked!” As a result, this negative mental chatter often attracts A LOT of negative feedbacks from girls because they can pick up his “negative vibe.”
But guys who are really good with women, you know, the “Naturals”, they NEVER walk around with a “negative” mindset, and as a result, they get BETTER RESULTS and ENJOY the “process.” If they get blown by the girl, they re-frame it as something that was just FUN or HILARIOUS.
Here’s how you do it too: change your “negative” mental chatter in your head to either “That went really well” or “That was fun!” and all of your interactions will go really well or really funny! It’s that simple.
4. Grab her attention
Before you even utter a word GET HER ATTENTION. I’ve noticed a lot of guys starting to talk to a girl even before she’s even ready to listen to them.
But, on the other hand, if you grab her attention first before talking, you’ll avoid that awkward situation where you just said something to her but she does not have a clue what you just said to her.
Here’s how you can grab a girl’s attention: approach her and say, “Hey, just a second…” or simply say “Hi” and follow up with a looooooooong pause to grab her attention.
5. Pace her “reality”
What do I mean when I say “pace her reality”?
When you approach a girl randomly, you acknowledge the fact that it was very “random” and you just wanted to say “Hi” to her.
Let’s say, you saw a beautiful girl waiting for a bus standing next to you, you can say, “Hey, I know it’s RANDOM, but I had to say HI to you. I think I like how you’re dressed and that makes you look gorgeous. What’s your name?”
When you accept this basic fact (random), you instantly establish yourself as a guy who has “social intelligence,” which makes her feel comfortable, and as a result, she’ll more likely open up to TALK to you.
Or, if she’s in a rush, you can say “I understand you’re in a rush, but I just wanted to say hi to you…” which will make her stop and talk to you for a while. Why? Because she knows you’re going to take all of her time.
6. Playfully persist
Once you’re good at all of the above skills, your next goal would be talking to a random girl for 20 to 30 seconds. I understand it’s a little bit difficult, especially if you’re a beginner at meeting girls during the day, but it’s super important that you DO IT.
Why should you talk to her for 20 to 30 seconds?
Simply because when you’re doing all of the steps above… she still thinks she’s talking to a random “stranger” on the street, which can make her feel self-conscious. But you can easily barrel through this brief moment by exuding your interest in her.
Now go out and make it happen.
P.S. BTW, if you are ready to learn simple, yet powerful tips on how to approach any random girl you want on the streets, cafes, malls, or anywhere else during the day and be able to have an effective conversation with her, build enough trust you comfort and connect with her on all emotional levels…
… so that she feels compelled to give you her number (or go out on an instant date) and actually show up on date, not FLAKE on you, and willingly follows you back to your apartment for a passionate love-making session…